Our 2014 Year In Review

What a crazy year it has been! We have had lots of ups and downs. But I will forever be grateful for the year our family grew by 3! So, here is our year in review...

January

We celebrated Kelly's 25th birthday with his favorite cake: strawberry! 

We had several days of snow in January. Even though I loathe driving in the snow, it's always so magical when a blanket of white covers our little corner of the world.

February

Zailey and I took advantage of a warm day in February and walked the path at the lake.

Kelly surprised me on Valentine's day with some red roses.

We had more snow. And we took the dogs sledding!

We were told to try out the all you can eat catfish at the Trail's End BBQ in Owasso. It was delicious!

As were were enjoying our meal, the entire staff started closing doors and window blinds. We were starting to wonder if they were closing when we realized Garth had entered the building. No, I did not get his autograph. I thought long and hard about it, but I didn't want to disturb him. He had on a baseball hat and seemed to greatly appreciate the lengths the entire staff went through to make sure he had a nice, quiet dinner. Kelly took a stalker photo. So, we sent it to my aunt and uncle who adore Garth and Trisha. 

March

In March, I turned 25 and cried. I'm only 5 years from 30. It just makes me sad. We had a nice bbq with our church family (not to celebrate birthday--just to spend quality time together). Kelly and Luke grilled up some delicious food!

Some of my best friends are little guys. And some of the best conversations of my life begin with a green mustache :)

April

In April, we purchased our first home after a year of trying to buy a house. When God made our little home, I know he meant it for us. Because the moment I sent Kelly the listing (which was listed too high for our budget) he said, "I've already called the Realtor. We're going to look at it tonight!" Finally, on April 9th, we moved in! 

May

I planted flowers. Oh, did I plant flowers. And they were BEAUTIFUL

And we adopted our sweet Malamute, Abner Dean Chance. Yes, he has two middle names because Kelly and I couldn't agree on one!

June

Our family grew by 2 when my brother married his wife. I now have a step-niece! Zach flew to San Francisco to wed his bride. Please excuse the airport picture. He refuses to smile like a normal human being in photos with me because...well, he's my younger brother. That's what they do. 

 But seriously, my sister-in-law looks like she's just stepped out of a magazine. All. The. Time. I don't know how she does it.

Kelly and I celebrated 3 blissful years of marriage! I can't remember how we celebrated, but we are headed to Branson in 2015 to celebrate our 4th anniversary. 

July

Our family grew again! My brother-in-law married his bride at Kelly's aunt and uncle's house. It was a HOT day and I think I was sweating profusely the entire time and looked disgusting. But the bride looked GORGEOUS! I guess the groom did, too ;)

I got into a car accident a few days before the wedding. An elderly lady had a heart attack and came head-on into my lane. I was miserable afterwards. My body ached. My car had $9,000 in damage. And I was car-less. It was a rough period for me while we fought the insurance company and I said goodbye to the first car my hubby bought me. RIP Lincoln, RIP.

August

We spent every waking moment at the lake, fishing. Well, Kelly fished. I read. I sunbathed. I closed my eyes and relaxed in the Oklahoma heat as the water lapped against the shoreline. It was a glorious time!

September

Finally, after being without a vehicle for over two months, Kelly and I bought the Explorer!

I went on a Ladies' Retreat with my church ladies! It was my first retreat and we had a BLAST. I'm already looking forward to our trip in 2015!

Let me just take a moment to say how wonderful my husband is. For two years in a row, he has been totally fine with me vacationing without him. So, I took a week and went to Colorado to spend lots of time with my sweet family. Honestly, I live for the one week a year I spend with the people who have watched me grow from a young child into a woman. 

I don't think I will make it to Colorado in 2015. We have two trips planned. One to Branson and one to Nebraska to visit my grandfather's birthplace. We are also hoping to head to California in the fall, but we have to see how Kelly's work schedule goes. He has been so busy this year! But we are grateful for every blessing that has come out of his hard work!

Until our next vacation, I will stare longingly at my Colorado trip pictures.

October

October in Oklahoma means one thing for me: HOLIDAYS. We started our October off with a trip to Shepherd's Cross with our Church's homeschool group. 

I really love the time I get to spend with our church kids and their lovely moms. I am very blessed when it comes to the ladies I am surrounded by. They are all funny, smart, sweet and love Jesus. I look forward to the day that my kids are playing alongside theirs. 

November

November was filled with LOTS of family time. We played tennis, disc golf and celebrated Thanksgiving.

December

We started December off right with a trip to the Owasso Christmas Tree Farm to pick up this beauty!

December was filled with lots of fun! First, my brother and I headed on a long trek to California to pick up my sister-in-law's things out of storage. We stopped to see my dad and grandparents along the way. You can read about our adventure here. 

Then, we headed to Silver Dollar City for a family vacation. You can read all about it here. 

We made it to our local Christmas parade for some fun! It was the first year I have actually gone to it. I'm looking forward to making it a regular December event.

And then my cat of 9 years, Oliver James (yes, I give ALL my animals middle names) passed away. It was a very, very sad day.

FINALLY, we somehow made it to Christmas. But my mother-in-law got sick so we did Christmas Eve and Christmas Day dinner at our house. I'm so grateful that God has blessed us with a home large enough to hold everyone. Overall, it was a wonderful Christmas!

I'm very grateful for such a wonderful year, though it had it's rough moments. I'm looking forward to another great year with my family and friends. We have lots of fun things planned and I can't wait to see what God has in store for us!

Why Can't We Just Be Friends?

Photo cred: Pinterest.com

I remember my first frenemy. She lived a few houses down from me in my childhood home. Her name was Holly and she was hard to get along with. Mostly because if I did not make her the center of attention, she would run to her mother and tell on me. I would endure a long lecture about how I'm a "terrible friend".

But Holly wasn't the only frenemy on Rambling Heights Lane. Denise was just as terrible. She spent her free time bullying me. And putting me down. And her mother joined in on the fun, too.

There were frenemies at school. Frenemies at dance class. They were EVERYWHERE. They pretended to like me to my face, then turned around and unleashed their nasty words and actions. Sometimes within ear shot; other times girls would come running to me, "You'll never believe what so-and-so said about you."

To this day, I'm still dealing with frenemies. Women who are hot and cold. They're my best friend one week while trying to get some juicy gossip on my marriage. Or my brother's. The next week? They're looking me up and down with a disgusted look and whispering to someone about how "terrible" my shoes are. Or that fact that I'm "not cool" because I do not shop at Forever 21. I. Can't. Even. Understand. This. As an almost a 26 year-old professional with a limited clothing budget, I'm totally for buying my clothes in the "Ladies" section. On sale. And with a gift card. Sometimes, my best finds come from the thrift store. If you want to purchase your clothes at the mall, I'm totally fine with it. Really. I am. Your clothes mean nothing to me; it's your heart that truly matters in my eyes.

Most of the time, I can easily brush off these strange occurrences of tearing me down. I mean, I have been dealing with this MY ENTIRE LIFE. Case in point: see first two paragraphs.

But at this point in my life, I keep asking myself, "Why are women so mean to each other? Why can't we just be friends?"

I don't really have any concrete answers. Since Bible times, women have been in open competition for what the other has had. They have fought and broken each other down, mostly over jealousy.

Hannah and Peninniah are two women who could not get along.

"Because the LORD had closed Hannah's womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the LORD, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat. Her husband Elkanah would say to her, "Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don't you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don't I mean more to you than ten sons?" 1 Samuel 1:6-8

Peninniah provoked Hannah. I don't know all the reasons why, but my best guess is that Elkanah loved Hannah more, so a jealous Peninniah used her words to wound.

But these aren't the only two ladies who fought. Sisters Leah and Rachel were fiercely jealous of each other and competed for children and Jacob's love.

"When Rachel saw that she was not bearing Jacob any children, she became jealous of her sister. So she said to Jacob, "Give me children, or I'll die!" Genesis 30: 1

Jealousy correlates to "fear", "insecurity", and "anxiety". Emotions we all experience at one point or another. We're jealous of each other because that's what we've been doing for centuries.

We're jealous of the woman who has it all. "She works a full-time job. Her kids are so well-behaved. How does she keep her house so clean?"

We're jealous of the housewife. "Why doesn't she get a real job? She has all the free time in the world. She should be working. Her husband must make a lot of money. You'd think she'd go get her hair done or buy a new outfit."

We are outright nasty to each other. I am the first to admit that I sometimes find myself thinking unflattering thoughts about other women. But, for the most part, I get it. I get the hours that go unseen by the watchful eyes of other women. I get the hours we all pour into the behind-the-scenes work.

I get the woman who has it all. She barely sleeps because her house doesn't clean itself. She stays up all night long with a sick child while preparing tomorrow morning's presentation. She bribes her kids with ice cream to behave in public because she needs a break from all the fighting for just one hour.

I get the woman who spends her days at home. Who labors over budgets and bill paying. Who sweeps dusty floors while her husband and children sleep soundly in their warm beds. Who bakes cookies for the nursing home. Who must run the errands no one else can because she's at home and surely must have the time.

 We, as women, are all the same. We have different personalities, different responsibilities, different jobs, different hearts, but we are all the same. We all work hard. We all give life the very best of us. We are all weary. We all carry heavy burdens. We all have good days and bad days. We have failures and successes.

So, why can't we just be friends?

And encourage each other? And share the burdens? And love each other well? And set aside our different tastes for shoes, makeup, clothes, careers, and TV shows to be good to each other?

Why don't we stop looking at the outside and start searching the inside? 

Ladies, you have nothing to be jealous of. What you possess, no other woman on this planet does. No one has it all together. No one goes without trials and hardships. No one is perfect. No one is YOU. And the world needs YOU to be uniquely YOU.

Stop the judging. Stop the gossip. Stop the bullying. Set aside years of jealousy that have transferred from generation to generation and LOVE EACH OTHER.

Because tomorrow isn't a guarantee. And we all enter this world and leave it the same way. The rest is just details!

Merry Christmas From the Hansens!

From our family to yours! We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

--The Hansens

Easy Stuffed Mushrooms

These stuffed mushrooms are easy. Almost too easy. In fact, when I thought up the recipe while standing in the doorway of my open refrigerator, I thought they'll never turn out good!

BUT THEY DID. Oh, they did. And my husband said, "PLEASE make these again!" Honestly, he never says that. He thinks I'm a mediocre cook. Which is true. I can't cook to save my life. Baking on the other hand...

So, here is an easy stuffed mushroom recipe you will WOW your spouse, your kids, your friends, or a large crowd of people with! I promise. They're THAT good.

Note: Jalapenos were used in the making of this recipe. DO NOT touch your eyes, even after you have washed your hands THREE times. The juice will still be present on your fingertips after handling and your eyes will BURN. Not that I know or anything...;)

So, here's what you're going to need:

10 mushrooms
1/2 pound ground beef (turkey or sausage, just whatever you have on hand)
4 oz softened cream cheese
1 tbsp garlic powder
1 tbsp onion powder
Sliced jalapenos

Total time: 30 min

Directions:

1. Preheat your oven at 350 degrees.

2. Brown ground beef in a skillet.

3. While beef is browning, pit the mushrooms and then wash them. I like to remove stem, then use a spoon and scrape out the insides to create a big pocket because it makes stuffing easier.

4. Mix softened cream cheese with garlic powder and onion powder in a bowl. Set aside until it's time to toss in the ground beef.

5. Once the ground beef is browned, drain it and place in cream cheese bowl. Mix together with the cream cheese mixture.

6. Stuff mushrooms with ground beef mixture. If you like spicy hot, add a sliced jalapeno to the top of the stuffed mushroom. I am not a huge spicy fan...OK I'm not a huge jalapeno fan. I had a bad experience once. So, I made a few without jalapenos and a few with. Both turned out delicious!

7. Place on a cooking sheet and put in the oven. Cook for 15 minutes.

8. Remove from oven and enjoy!


What did I pair these easy stuffed mushrooms with?

Italian sausage and vegetables!

I sliced sausage in half and let cook slowly in cast iron pan for 50 minutes.

Broccoli and carrots were put into a pan until boil. Turned off burner, covered for 15 minutes then drained and seasoned with butter, sea salt, and pepper.

An easy, simple meal for you and your family!

To purchase the cast iron skillet and/or pot I used for this recipe, visit MY STORE. 

Why This Place Is Good For Your Marriage

Disclaimer: I am in no way, shape or form an expert on marriage or being a helpmeet. I am simply a good, Godly wife who wants the best for her marriage and yours. It's also important to note the following does not address abusive marriages where lives are endangered. If you find yourself in such a marriage, consult with a pastor or his wife immediately.

I come from a broken home. I watched the love two people once had for each other turn cold and bitter. It ruined my world for many years. Not to worry, I'm over it now. But it didn't come without its years of baggage and issues that needed to be worked out. 

Because my parent's divorce was so hard on me, it has always been something I desperately want to save others from. I want all women to have happy, healthy marriages with their husbands. Because who wants to bicker all the time? Who wants to fight all the time? Who wants to destroy something that has the potential to be so wonderful?

You can call me old-fashioned. You can make underhanded comments about me being stuck in a decade that no longer exists because women have made "great strides" since the 1800's. You are entitled to your own opinion. If you don't want to better your marriage, you might as well close out this window now.

BUT

It's important that you know I am simply trying to help you in the only way I know how: real, hard truth. From a woman who has continually asked God for wisdom and received it. 

No, I am not a doormat. 

No, I am not without my strong opinions, which I like to express to my husband in a mature, adult manner. 

I am the furthest thing from a quiet, meek wife who spends her days slaving away for her husband.

Yes, I do things for my husband with a happy spirit.

Yes, I like to please my husband in any way I can.

But isn't that what we do for people we love? 

We want to express our love with actions and words. If that is old-fashioned, I'm perfectly fine being called that. I'm perfectly fine being considered a wife who likes to make her husband happy. 

It would break my heart to be the alternative, a selfish, demanding wife.

This blog has been dedicated to my wifely journey since it's implementation. I started it because I wanted to have journals my future children could read and learn from. I didn't want my mistakes to be their mistakes. What better way to do it than to preserve it in a blog filled with my thoughts and words that won't rip or fade over time? If others shared in my journey, then that was just the icing on the cake! 

Kelly and I on our wedding day, June 18, 2011

Here's what this blog has taught me over the years: we all struggle and fail from time-to-time in our relationships. And sometimes, we just need a little encouragement from someone who knows what we're going through.

I, too, fail my husband daily, even though my intentions are always pure and good. But my husband is a great forgiver. For that, I am eternally grateful. Don't beat yourself up over your mistakes; learn from them. Grow. Love deeper today than you did yesterday.

To clear things up: I do not write a blog from a man's perspective. You probably won't see any post titles that say, "Husbands, Love Your Wives Better!" or "How To Make Sure Your Wife Always Feels Love and Adored." 

I'm not a husband. I have no authority to write on being one. Honestly, I don't think men would want to read a blog post directed at them by a twenty-something year old woman whose only been married for 3 1/2 years. I have no authority on husbandly duties, though I do have my strong opinions. My husband, on the other hand, could probably write a few posts about leadership and love. He has the authority on it. I, however, do not.

If you are a wife who would like to encourage your husband with articles on Godly truth, I recommended checking out Matthew L. Jacobson's website. He has the authority to give your husband Godly advice that I, simply, cannot. He has also written a book titled, "100 Ways to Love Your Wife." If your husband has a Kindle, this book would make a great addition to his library for only $3.99! I often share Mr. Jacobson's blog posts with my husband to encourage his leadership in our home. I have yet to purchase his book because my husband--WHO IS NOT A READER--is currently going through "Created To Need A Helpmeet" by Michael and Debi Pearl at a slow pace. I'm afraid I'd overwhelm him if I asked him to read another book so soon! But, it's on my list of books to one day read through with him in the future.

So, now that I have provided you with a few options to share with your husband and his role in your marriage, let's get down to business.

Where is the best place for you to visit with your husband each week? 

Church. 

Since my husband and I got married 3 1/2 years ago, not a week has passed that we have not entered our church building and spent time with our brothers and sisters in Christ. We didn't start our marriage overly-involved in our church. We spent the first year of our marriage cultivating our relationship and the relationships with the people who gather at the same place we do several times a week.

In the dark moments of our marriage, I know I have many sisters who would happily sit with me and offer words of encouragement and scripture to aid me in my wife journey. I know that they care about my marriage. I know that they care about my marriage's success. And instead of telling me, "If you're unhappy, leave your marriage," with lots of love and grace, they would tell me, "If you're unhappy, change your marriage." 

That change begins with me.

And my attitude toward my marriage.

And the prayers I pray for my marriage.

Years later, my husband is leading the Media Ministry in our church and I spend my Sunday mornings loving on a group of preschoolers I can't imagine my life without. We are heavily-involved in our church because it's important for us to surround ourselves with people who care about our marriage. It's also important for us to do good. It's important for us to be accountable for our actions inside and outside of our marriage. 

But mostly, it's important that our marriage strengthens us not only together, but as individuals. 

And what better place to do it than in a church filled with people who are just likes us: broken, but so in love with Jesus.

I have had the experience of witnessing my brothers and sisters in Christ marrying people who don't love Jesus. I think they are under the illusion that they can "change" the person with "time". That is a noble idea, and I'm not saying it doesn't happen. But chances are the person won't change. Chances are the person will pull them away from the one place they should turn in times of trouble. And they will do life on their own--away from God. 

What you will discover is that a marriage without God has a harder time of surviving than a marriage with God. The marriage will eventually pull completely away from God and the church. And if there aren't a group of people who love this marriage and point both husband and wife to Jesus, in its darkest moments, what will hold it together?

My husband and I have been through some rough patches. Neither of us are saints, and we disappoint each other. But every day, I wake up and thank God that my husband loves Jesus and encourages me to love people better. 

I know that our marriage has been blessed because of our willingness to put God at the center of our relationship. And when I see the trials of other young couples who don't make God a priority, I am so thankful that my husband's favorite place to be on Sunday morning is in our church, and has been since the day he made me his wife. 

Where do you and your husband find yourselves on Sunday morning? Do you find yourselves in a pew or ignoring the alarm clock that goes off, missing church and the many blessings God has in store for you every Sunday morning?

Make church a priority and see what God does with two people who want to know and love Him better.

Kelly and I December 2014

Your Wife-Friend in Christ,

Jessica

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