What Love Really Means

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

Love is a popular topic. And why shouldn't it be? There are so many different types of love: unrequited love, platonic love, passionate love, sacrificial love, unconditional love, forbidden love, etc. The list is endless. And writers (much like myself) love to write about love. But I'm afraid that somewhere between the fairy tale and real life, we've forgotten that love is so much more than the things we read or watch. Luckily for me, I was reminded this week what love really means.

I was a very angry 14 year-old not too long ago. My mother worked two jobs, and she wasn't there in the morning when I'd wake up. I'd eat my breakfast alone, wishing she was sitting across the table from me. She wasn't there to pack my lunch. She wasn't there to tell me she hoped I had a good day as I walked out the front door. And if I was having one of those every-piece-of-clothing-I-own-is-piled-on-the-bed days, she wasn't there to help me pick out an outfit.

For a long time, I couldn't understand that her not being there wasn't her choice. Life doesn't always go the way we hope it does. Sometimes we're blindsided. Sometimes the path diverges. Sometimes God has other plans. Her not being there had nothing to do with her wanting to be away from my brother and I. In fact, it was quite the opposite. She loved us so much that she was willing to get up at four every morning and work two jobs without complaint. Her love for us kept her going, and it was the same thing that taught me real love cannot compare to the love we read or write about in stories.

When things don't work out the way we planned, love is patient. When someone hurts us, love is kind. When there's an argument, love does not boast. When someone puts their needs above ours, love is not self-seeking. When someone wrongs us, love keeps no records. When the world seems to be crashing down around us, love protects. When we've been disappointed or hurt, love trusts. When all seems lost, love hopes. When failure upon failure presents itself, love perseveres.

As I thought back to all the sacrifices my mother made for my brother and I all those years ago, I realized that's the way I want to love others. I want to put their needs above my own. I want to serve them without expecting anything in return. And when someone hurts me, I want to cry it out and let it go. Because that's what love really means.